I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize