just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
how does that bad decision feel?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
