I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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