It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
