Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
