tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
