She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
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I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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