Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
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