Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
