Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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