we're chasing vodka with high fives
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize