there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Randomize
