Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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