I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize