Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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