Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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