; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
