if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
i out mim tonsoeep
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