yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
