Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
