whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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