i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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