im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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