hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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