There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize