The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
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