At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
