Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize