It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
