when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
