Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
