they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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