..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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