I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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