and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
