So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
