And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
