She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I love you. Go after that dick
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize