i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
