i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
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