We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
