Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
