i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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