I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
