I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
