Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(281): View more from Texas

He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid

(918): View more from Oklahoma

Did you send adult things?

(281): View more from Texas

Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year

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(631): View more from New York

there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.

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(805): View more from California

Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"

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23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(941): View more from Florida

She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???

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(917): View more from New York City

I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.

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(801): View more from Utah

We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party

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(519): View more from Ontario

You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies

(1-519): View more from Ontario

Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me

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(201): View more from New Jersey

That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag

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