I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
