Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
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