It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
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