First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Randomize
